Overcoming Fear, Doubt & Worry – INTRODUCTION

No matter where the fear came from, we can create new connections by choosing new thoughts.

My apologies! I hadn’t realized how long it had been since my last blog! Life — as they say — has gotten in the way. It’s mostly all good but very time and attention consuming. Like getting married, having out-of-town guests, having eye surgery, working on the 6-session course I’m creating. Blah – blah – blah. Anyway, I am now back and hope to begin my regular schedule of blogs, which is once a week. But, don’t hold me to it!

The theme of this series is “Overcoming Fear, Doubt & Worry”, which is also the theme of the presentation I will be giving on Monday evening. I thought I would hit some of the highlights here and maybe record the Monday-night presentation to share later. As you know, fear is a very normal emotion and is not a bad emotion in and of itself. What we do in response to the feeling, though, can lead to helpful or unhelpful consequences. So, when you feel fear, doubt yourself, or you are worried about how things will turn out in the future, don’t get down on yourself and try to not suppress the feelings.

The common result of doubt and worry is the feeling of fear, so we’ll focus on that.

The illustration shows the path of our thinking leading to the actions we take.

We think a thought.
That thought generates an image.
Then we have a feeling reaction in response to the image.
That all leads to us taking some sort of action.

What if we changed the original thought?

As an example, what happens if I think the thought, “I don’t have enough time to get everything done today?” The image might be of me scurrying around frantically. It might also include other people expressing anger that I didn’t get something done that they expected. My feelings in response to that image or images would likely be fear, doubt, and worry.

The action I might take would be to rush around, possibly getting into trouble (like a car accident) trying to accomplish everything on my list of things to do. If nothing else, I would cause myself to experience an immense amount of stress.

What if, on the other hand, my thought was “I have a lot to do today, but I’m confident that I can get the most important things done by the end of the day.” The images, the feelings, and the actions would probably be very different, right? And my stress level would be much lower, too.

Can an emotion like fear ever result in a positive outcome? Well, yes, it can. For example, if you are being pursued down the trail by a mountain lion, fear might come in handy. The fear would generate an increase in adrenaline that would help you run faster than you ever have before and yell louder for help than you ever have before.

But even in response to everyday experiences, the emotions fear, doubt, and worry give you very valuable information. They are telling you that something isn’t right, either in your thinking or in response to your environment. You can then re-evaluate the situation and decide if another action might be better.

It comes down to the thought, as described above. Examine the thought: Is it real? Is it true? Where did it come from?

I will add to this series, but if you want to do some work on your own, consider these questions and write down your answers:

List 3 of your current fears.
Acknowledge them for what they are.
- Where did they come from?
- Are they real for you now?
- Are they truly your enemy?
Now list one positive experience you would miss out on should you choose to let those fears control your life. For example, if you have a fear of being hurt in relationships, then you might miss out on the love that you could be receiving from others.